A father put his 3 year old daughter to bed, told her a story and listened to her prayers which she ended by saying: "God bless Mommy, God bless Daddy, God bless Grandma and Goodbye Grandpa."
The father asked: "Why did you say goodbye Grandpa, honey?"
The little girl said, "I don't know daddy, it just seemed like the thing to do."
The next day grandpa died.
The father thought it was a strange coincidence.
A few months later the father put the girl to bed and listened to her prayers which went like this: "'God bless Mommy, God Bless Daddy and goodbye Grandma."
The next day the grandmother died.
"Jezuz Jump-up Christ!" thought the father. "The kid is in contact with the other side!"
Several weeks later when the girl was going to bed, her daddy heard her say: "God bless Mommy. And Goodbye Daddy."
He barely made the bathroom before his bowels gave way uncontrollably. He couldn't sleep all night and got up at the crack of dawn to go to the office. He was nervous as a whore in church all day, drank lunch and watched the clock incessantly.
He figured if he could get by until midnight he would be okay. He felt safe in the office. So instead of going home at the end of the day he stayed there, drinking coffee, looking at his watch and jumping at every sound.
Finally, midnight arrived. He breathed a sigh of relief, staggered to the parking lot and drove home.
When he got home his wife, still up, looking haggard, said: "Where have you been? I've never seen you work so late--"
He said, "I don't want to talk about it! I just spent the worst day of my goddamned life!"
"You think you had a bad day," she said. "You won't fucking believe what happened to me."
"Hunh?"
"This morning my golf pro dropped dead in the middle of my lesson!"
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