Bunghole™

Those members of our readership unable to restrain themselves from the vile, contemptible product of our competitors (pederasts all, even the women)-- middle-brow rubbish such as "The Atlantic Monthlies," "The National Rebuke," "The New Pubic," et al--will be aware of their collectivist proclivity to append to back pages unctuously coy, pseudo-amusing game-like content at complete odds with the vein-opening, suicide inducing material contained elsewhere within the publication, without exception.

With this posting of The Journal, we are proud to present our own kinder, gentler, cuddlier, cutesier-wootsier, anti-realitycheck version of this phenomenon (drumroll): Bunghole™

The object of the game is to redact well known book, film and/or musical titles, substituting one key word in the title with another word to produce the titular equivalent of a neologism, the last dipthong of which you don’t wanna fool with.

In the grand tradition of Pragmatism™ and in lieu of a tiresome, dipsomaniacal explanation of the rules, we set forth below representative samples of typical new Bunghole™ titles in three (5) categories which should make the purpose of the exercise oblivious even to our readership.


Cinema

Gone With The Bunghole, Vivien Leigh
Mutiny on the Bunghole, Charles Laughton
Invasion of the Bunghole Snatchers, Don Siegel
The Bunghole of Suzie Wong, Wm Holden
Rear Bunghole, A. Hitchcock
Dirty Bunghole, Clint Eastwood
Four Weddings and a Bunghole, Richard Curtis
Bring Me The Bunghole of Diego Garcia, Sam Peckinpah



Literature/Belles Lettres

Of Human Bunghole, W Somerset Maugham
The Bunghole That Failed, Rudyard Kipling
Brave New Bunghole, A. Huxley
Wild Bungholes, Jung Chang
Call of the Bunghole, Jack London
Lonesome Bunghole, Larry McMurtry
Mein Bunghole, A. Hitler



Popular Music

I Wanna Hold Your Bunghole, The Beatles
I Can’t Get No Bunghole, The Rolling Stones
(And They Call It) Bunghole Love, Paul Anka
I've Got You Under My Bunghole, Frank Sinatra
A Bunghole Sang in Berkeley Square, Vera Lynn
Fascinating Bunghole, Judy Garland
(You Give Me) Bunghole, Peggy Lee

A prize of Laotian Kip 10,000,000 will be presented to the winner of next month's competition.