Give Me Your Thai, Your Poor....

Three contractors are bidding to fix a broken wall at the Pentagon: an African-American, a Mexican-American and a Thai just in from Nakorn Sawan.

They proceed on the site tour with a high-ranking Pentagon Procurement Officer to examine the wall and its environs, as required to submit a valid bid.

The black contractor and his assistant survey the site with a transit, input all the data into a laptop, run the figures based on the comprehensive labor and materials cost data within their proprietary spreadsheet program, carefully consider the whole project and then finalize their calculations.

"Well," he announces to the Procurement Officer, "I figure the job will run about $901 million: $400 million for materials, $400 million for my crew and $1 million profit for me."

The Mexican contractor holds his thumb up to the general area, does a little measuring with a tape measure, throws some blades of grass into the air to calculate wind speed and then sits down to do his calculations.

To the Procurement Officer, he finally advises: "I can do this job for $701 million: $300 million for materials, $300 million for my illegal space alien crew and $1 million profit for me."

The Thai contractor doesn't measure anything or make any calculations whatsoever but leans over to the Pentagon official and whispers, "$2 trillion, 701 million."

The official, incredulous, protests: "You didn't even measure or calculate like the other bidders!! How did you come up with such a ridiculous price?"

The Thai contractor whispers back, "$1 trillion for you, $1 trillion for me and we hire the Mexican to fix the fence."

The Pentagon Procurement Officer holds out his hand and says, "Welcome to the United States."