For Christopher Hitchens and Allan Turner
The nurse with the ass that made you want to shoot yourself approached the derelict, smiled and said, "Doctor see you now."
She helped him up out of the chair and escorted him down the corridor to the surgery.
Inside, seated behind the desk, sat the normally cheerful Dr Busapavanich who did not look happy. Stenberg managed a wai but the doctor waved it away and told him to sit down.
"Khun Bo, no sense to beat the bush. It is Parkinson's."
"Parkinsons!?" ejaculated Stenberg, immediately rejuvenated. "Why, that's wonderful! What luck! I've been waiting years for this!"
"Uh, Khun Bo. This is not good. This is a degenerative condition."
"Oh come off it, Louie. This is my moment! I've finally made the grade, see? I'm a goddamned parvenu. An arriviste, with any luck. I'll finally be somebody! It's just like winning the lottery with a stolen lottery ticket. Not that I ever--"
"No. Not that."
"Well then. Who cares?"
"Bo baby. There are techniques now, new genomic research...."
"Do you mind if I smoke?" inquired Stenberg.
"Not at all. I'll have one too if you don't mind. Kindly shove that towel on the floor into the space at the bottom."
"It's not thaistick, Louie."
"That distinction, like a few others, my friend, is from another time. The towel please." Stenberg pushed the towel under the door with an abandoned prophylaxis.
"You don't have a drink on you?" inquired the patient.
"Not here. Out in the BMW."
"The Peter Principle you say--"
"Yes."
"Aha. So with Parkinson's I'll simply fall apart. But I'll still have the king kong kuay."
"That is correct."
She helped him up out of the chair and escorted him down the corridor to the surgery.
Inside, seated behind the desk, sat the normally cheerful Dr Busapavanich who did not look happy. Stenberg managed a wai but the doctor waved it away and told him to sit down.
"Khun Bo, no sense to beat the bush. It is Parkinson's."
"Parkinsons!?" ejaculated Stenberg, immediately rejuvenated. "Why, that's wonderful! What luck! I've been waiting years for this!"
"Uh, Khun Bo. This is not good. This is a degenerative condition."
"Oh come off it, Louie. This is my moment! I've finally made the grade, see? I'm a goddamned parvenu. An arriviste, with any luck. I'll finally be somebody! It's just like winning the lottery with a stolen lottery ticket. Not that I ever--"
"Khun Bo--"
"Bo Baby to you."
"OK. Bo Baby. This is Parkinson's Disease. You will disintegrate."
"Bullshit. Do you take me for a fool? I know what Parkinson's is. It's when you've been promoted to your level of incompetence. I've been waiting for this since 1953."
"Bo," intoned the physician, "that is the Peter Principle."
Stenberg froze as if plunged into a world of liquid nitrogen.
"You don't mean...?" His eyes charted 180°South magnetic.
"Bo Baby to you."
"OK. Bo Baby. This is Parkinson's Disease. You will disintegrate."
"Bullshit. Do you take me for a fool? I know what Parkinson's is. It's when you've been promoted to your level of incompetence. I've been waiting for this since 1953."
"Bo," intoned the physician, "that is the Peter Principle."
Stenberg froze as if plunged into a world of liquid nitrogen.
"You don't mean...?" His eyes charted 180°South magnetic.
"No. Not that."
"Well then. Who cares?"
"Bo baby. There are techniques now, new genomic research...."
"Do you mind if I smoke?" inquired Stenberg.
"Not at all. I'll have one too if you don't mind. Kindly shove that towel on the floor into the space at the bottom."
"It's not thaistick, Louie."
"That distinction, like a few others, my friend, is from another time. The towel please." Stenberg pushed the towel under the door with an abandoned prophylaxis.
The two men inhaled, leaned back and gave the situation due diligence.
"You don't have a drink on you?" inquired the patient.
"Not here. Out in the BMW."
"The Peter Principle you say--"
"Yes."
"Aha. So with Parkinson's I'll simply fall apart. But I'll still have the king kong kuay."
"That is correct."
"And the sildenafil...?"
"Never a problem in your case, my friend."
They smoked in silence a while.
"It's a great pity, Louie. From a certain perspective, I mean. I don't have to tell you what it is, really."
"Arai na?"
"It means, Louie," said the derelict with a thousand yard stare he had not possessed a mere ten minutes before, "it means that I failed to get promoted to my level of incompetence."
.
"It's a great pity, Louie. From a certain perspective, I mean. I don't have to tell you what it is, really."
"Arai na?"
"It means, Louie," said the derelict with a thousand yard stare he had not possessed a mere ten minutes before, "it means that I failed to get promoted to my level of incompetence."
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